Beside Restful Waters

"Human beings do not tend to get deeply excited about things unless

we are somehow deeply part of it."

~ Fr. Richard Rohr

So, happy Easter to those of us who participate in this Christian ceremony. Father Rohr makes his statement above in relation to the Easter celebration of the passion, death and resurrection of Jesus the Christ.

This statement was an eye opener. I asked myself: Just how am I a part of the resurrection of Jesus the Christ?

Just what is it that I am deeply a part of?

There were several answers to this question for me:

My job: As my career progressed, I got more and more passionate about my career.

Marriage and family: As we approach the celebration of our 48th year of marriage, I am amazed about the depth of love that has grown.

Recovery: Wow!

There is a common denominator in each of these involvements. Each has had traumatic experiences that gave me, demanded of me, a point of decision. In my job, I was fired three times. (yes, I am slow to get the message at times.) There was the demand that I go deep inside to evaluate the reasons for the firings and my willingness to change and retain a job.

During our marriage, there was the demand to choose divorce or growth. Fortunately, we chose growth. The growing pains were severe enough for us to ask for help, AND to accept that help with an evolution of honesty, passion, death to self, and resurrection of our union.

Recovery! Here, the demand for honesty was excruciating. As I became more and more a part of recovery, I observed personal defects that had undermined the trauma of both my job and marriage. It took me ten years of passion and pain to invest, with passion and pain, the surrender of my ego to truly begin to become part of a sober life style.

Just how did I "become part of it?”

I not only asked my Higher Power for help, I had to accept that help.

Where did that help come from?

You!. There are hundreds of you whom, over the past twenty years, over my entire lifetime, that answered my plea for the help of my God, my Higher Power. You have been the eyes that cried with me, the ears that have listened to my agony - over and over and over -, and the voice that has repeated some of the same healing words over and over and over, the arms which have held my sobbing body, and the soul which has shared your own agony with the pain and compassion that results in our healing.

I don't know if or how you participate in the resurrection celebration of the Christian Easter event. What I do know is how you participate in my life, death and resurrection on a day to day basis. Together, we are the embodiment of shared tears, shared agony, shared compassion, and shared healing. This is it my beloved friends. This is the substance of sobriety, of death, of resurrection, of a peace beyond all understanding.

As I pause and ponder, I am overwhelmed with gratitude.

I'll take this gratitude with me to the restful waters where I spend so much time. A side note here as we just returned from Maui and South Korea. While in both of these locations, we walked beaches and river banks every day. You all were there with us, beside these restful waters.

Namaste'