“Act as if you trust your God.”
Really? Act as if I trust my God. Isn’t this just like living another lie? I spent decades in lies. I was so good at lying that I believed my lies. Now I should put on an act?
As always, I have to stop and ponder this predicament. As a child, I memorized my multiplication tables even though I did not fully understand math. I committed many facts, pledges and historical data to memory even though I did not understand them. Today, I have many sayings and prayers committed to memory even though I don’t fully understand them. However, I am finding that there is an ongoing revelation to the meaning of this stuff of my memory. Life experiences seem to have a way of opening up the meanings of experiences long after they occur.
One of the essential experiences which has made these revelations possible has been sobriety. The first step of sobriety was asking for help. In this process I observed a loosening of the bonds of addiction. (Psalm 116: 16) With time and the practice of sobriety, “acting as if I was sober”, my soul began to actually experience the joy of this new freedom. Life began to unfold in fullness. (John 10:10) As a result, gratitude began to inhabit the good, the bad and the ugly.
I began to notice a growing number of people expressing gratitude for their addictions. The bad and ugly of addiction led them, led us, to a freedom which exposed us to the fullness of life. As we experienced a growing trust in our Higher Powers, we became willing to give the life of sobriety to each other. Rolf Gates and Katrina Kenison put it this way: “Our problem solved, it is up to us to become a part of the solution.” (Meditations from the Mat)
The practice of ‘acting as if’ becomes the substance of our solution. The act becomes reality. Memorizing takes on meaning. Devotion to Higher Power takes on love and grace. The act of trusting in a Higher Power, God, becomes a life of trust. This is the dance of life.
Rolf and Katrina offer a wonderful method of living in devotion to God. It is a simple breath practice. Here it is: (Meditations from the Mat, page 131)
Try this today in your own practice: As you inhale, draw life energy in. Then as you exhale, radiate that heart energy out into the world. Both actions must be honored in our spiritual lives.
In my practice, this is a wonderful rhythm to a slow dance. As I close my eyes, I am drawn beside the restful waters. During the exhale, you are all there. Even more, the pains of our friends and neighbors are there. The political tensions of the world are there. We come together in the rhythm of our dance and our energy quiets the tensions and pains. Our dance of life takes root. We are the foundation of the solutions. We dance barefoot in the sand.
We dive in the waters. Skinny dipping is mandatory.